The Value of Balance
A few months ago as I was in the process of developing my company’s values, I was having a conversation with someone from my Mastermind community who was also a business owner. I’m not sure of the context of how it came up, but she mentioned in passing that one of her company values was balance. I had realized when she said it that the idea of balance had not come up once while I was drafting Doerr&Co.’s values.
It was a lightbulb moment for me as I recognized that, while I had technically created a business partly because I needed balance and flexibility as the on-call parent, I hadn’t actually thought to include it formally in my values statement until this moment. The values I had already drafted were lofty and external: social justice and equity, allyship, reflection and growth, etc. And these are essential and important, but without including the “balance” part of it, how was I to hold myself accountable to the self-care and restoration needed to actually keep me on a path to be an effective ally or fight for justice and equity? Having that balance also makes me better at the job I’m doing as I can be truly present with my clients.
The topic came up again in my biweekly Mastermind group meeting last week. I was struggling with what I perceived as motivation to stay present with the work I really do need to do and was feeling conflicted and down about it. But it was also a feeling of fatigue around being pulled in multiple directions when a month or so ago I felt so energized about everything I was doing. Part of it could be because it’s summer. Or that I’m feeling some feelings about the waning days of my little guy’s preschool years and wanting to be a part of all those moments. Or that I’m coming down from the high and excitement of launching the website and the business.
But also, as a business owner, it can be difficult to separate your work from your life. Especially as a writer. I feel like 50% of my writing doesn’t happen in front of a computer, rather it happens while I’m driving or on a hike with my kid when I’m dwelling on a story I’m writing trying to figure out the best way to tell it. Sometimes it’s just the spark of creativity and I write the thought down in a notebook and move on. But sometimes (a lot of times, actually), it’s worrying whether I captured a story I just turned in right or worrying that I’m just not finding the right structure for the book I’m co-writing. It takes practice to move on from those thoughts.
What helped, though, was the response from the incredible women in my Mastermind group who reminded me when I was expressing this: this is all okay, this is all normal, and you need to lean into the moment that you are in. One of them pointed out that I’m coming from an important place, a place where I want to put my whole self into my work. But sometimes, that “work” is being with my son, being with my family, being in a place that’s restoring myself. It was a reminder that part of my work is finding that balance.
Their assurances were a big reminder of the commitment I made when starting this business to find, maintain, and sit with that balance.
While my work load remains unchanged and there’s always work to get done (work that I still love and enjoy), I am not going to do it as well if I’m worrying about it. We all need balance and restoration and probably don’t need to be checking email when we’re on a hike.
I’m posting about it in a way to hold myself accountable to the balance I promised when writing the value statements for Doerr&Co. That accountability involves giving myself permission to just be in the moment whether it’s at work or at not-work.
When I’m working, that is where I should be: writing compelling stories, creating strategies, connecting with clients.
When I’m not working, that is where I should be: enjoying the hikes with my little guy, being in nature, sipping coffee in the sun. Sometimes it’s good to remind ourselves of that. Maybe this is a reminder of that, too.
Happy summer y’all!